Valentine’s Day reflection

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Since it’s Valentine’s Day I’d like to reflect on love.  Seems appropriate doesn’t it?  How do you feel about the word love?  It certainly brings up many preconceived ideas.  Romance, affection, loyalty, honesty, trust etc.  Who do we love? Families, friends, our pets, our husbands, wives, or life partners.  How do we demonstrate love?  Hugs, a kind word, encouragement, trust, honesty, and even just being there.

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What about ourselves?  Do we practice self-love?  What does it mean?  I’m talking about being kind to yourself, knowing yourself i.e. your strengths and weaknesses, respecting yourself, and taking care of you.  Erich Fromm wrote about the concept of self-love in 1956 in a book called The Art of Loving   He postulated that in order for one to express love to others, one must first demonstrate love to themselves.  This is different from selfishness or arrogance.

To me it means eating right; taking time out for our health.  If you think about it we are no good to anyone else if we are not healthy ourselves first and foremost. Also, knowing how we want to be treated by others and letting them know is another way to express love of ourselves. I am not so good with this one. There are a couple of people in my life who need to treat me better.  I know this, maybe they know this, but I have not made it clear to them so the status quo remains. The take home message for me is that I need to stand up for myself better.  It’s a work in progress. We may all have works in progress going on.  The main thing is being aware.  At least I am aware, right?

So, a few treats for ourselves from ourselves today might be:

  1. Create a self-love ritual: this may be something such as taking a bath with Epsom salts and your favorite essential oil.  One of my favorites is lavender.
  2. Build a community: build a community or network of positive people.  We need those who are positive and encouraging to lean on when times are tough.
  3. Create a “What’s Working For Me” list: jot down all the things that you do which are positive.
  4. Respect your body: eat nutritionally and mindfully.  Nutrient-rich foods will get you feeling great.
  5. Clean out your closet: this is something I need to do.  Get rid of the clutter and make space for new and positive adventures.
  6. Don’t compare yourself to others: this is incredibly hard because there are things which we could compare ourselves to everywhere!  However, this will only invite negativity. We are where we are and who we are and we need to accept this and be grateful for what we do have.
  7. Explore your spirituality: build faith in something. Having faith in something helps with intuition and gut instinct.
  8. Do something you are good at: the best way to build self-esteem! If you aren’t feeling so great pull out one of those hobbies and lose yourself in it for a few hours. By the end you will have created something and feel great.
  9. Find your happy place: maybe it’s sitting in the back yard with a good book.  Perhaps it’s gardening, watching a movie, or meditating.
  10. Learn how to let go: some days it’s easier than others; and some situations are tougher than others.  However, holding on to past hurts keeps us locked in the past. Focus on forgiveness and let go of these things.

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(This list was evolved from an article found on the great website MindBodyGreen).

Here’s to much love and happiness to you on this Valentine’s Day.

To your health,

 

Image credit: google.com

Meditation: what’s it all about?

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I have read a ton of articles over the past year from various sources touting the amazing benefits of meditation.  OK so it’s supposed to be good for you and there are some studies which support its benefits to both body and mind.  But what exactly is meditation?  It seems there are several forms.  How exactly is it good for me?  And who has time to sit and do nothing?  In our rushed and stressed out society it could seem counter intuitive to many.  Maybe even a waste of time!  This is to those of us that do have a hard time sitting still and turning off our mind.  It is very hard for me.  However because I keep reading about the abundant benefits I do believe that it is in my best interest to slow down and take a look at what it is all about and try to incorporate it into my life in 2015.  New year’s resolution?  Perhaps yes – can’t hurt me to at  least try it right?

Meditation is good for your mind; it changes your brain’s structure!

A study conducted at Massachusetts General Hospital (MGH) shows measurable changes in participants’ grey matter.  The regions demonstrating change are associated with memory, sense of self, empathy, and stress.  Grey matter density had actually increased.  I think I would love to be able to feel less stress just through building up some grey matter – and all I have to do is sit quietly!  Does it still sound like a waste of time endeavor?  Not so much.  I would rather not rely on prescription drugs to cope with daily overwhelm.

How do we get started?

  • Sit comfortably either cross-legged on the floor.  If that is uncomfortable, sit in a chair.
  • Sit up straight and close your eyes.
  • To maintain your neutral tall spine by inhaling and rolling your shoulders up to your ears.  As you exhale roll your shoulders back and down.  Repeat this if you feel yourself starting to slouch.
  • Breath simply through your nose; just breathing in and out.  Focus on the space between your nostrils and your lips.  Observe the sensation as your breath flows over this spot.
  • As your mind wonders bring it back to this space.  Be easy on yourself throughout the process.  Some days it will seem easier than others.
  • Observe any thoughts that come and go but don’t really judge them.  Just focus back on your breath.
  • Start with sessions of 5 minutes.  If you feel like going longer, go with it.
  • Likewise if you’re not feeling it one day listen to your intuition.  If you feel the need to move slightly, you can!
  • See this article for further information
  • Go easy on yourself; it is amazingly difficult to train your mind like this.  Especially when you’ve had a rough day!
  • Do what feels good!

To your health